Sunday, February 23, 2014

I wear Yoga Pants.

I am confident.  I am strong. I have self-worth, self-respect, dignity and integrity. I respect and value others.
And yes, I wear yoga pants.
In the last year, I balanced being an entrepreneur and President of an inspirational gift and lifestyle company, motivational speaker, trained for 100 mile Ultra marathon and completed it, fundraised for the race (raised over $11,000 for the Family Scholar House), Chaired the Taste of St. Raphael, coached our son’s basketball team, a husband who travels the world, two very active boys in school and lots of extracurricular activities…oh and let’s not forget our 100 pound dogJ
On any given moment, you could find me in anything from a business suit, business casual, work-out gear and yes, even yoga pants. 
Please do not mistake my work-out clothes or yoga pants for lack of caring or lack of self-respect.
I completely agree about dressing appropriately for the occasion; business meetings, interviews, nice restaurants, Church, family gatherings, holidays, a night-out.  Your attire shows respect for the occasion and the people involved with it.  First impressions and perceptions are a reality; therefore, making your clothing choices extremely important for some of the above occasions. 
However, a run to the grocery store in work-out clothes does not constitute a lack of self-respect or respect for others.   It’s called having a full schedule, multi-tasking and balancing. 
Furthermore, for some occasions a woman dressing up can look like she is trying too hard.  A woman trying too hard is never attractive.  Sometimes less is more.  
When I see a woman in work-out clothes, I think, “good for you for taking care of yourself”.  I see strength. When I see a woman without make-up, I see a confident, beautiful, strong woman.  For most in casual clothes, it is not that comfort is taking over;  it is a matter of scheduling.  Even if it is for comfort, provided the attire is appropriate for the occasion, if it is going to make the person happier, go for it.  I would much rather be around a happy, pleasant person even if she is in flats as opposed to heels.
I try not to judge.  For all women who feel they cannot leave the house without make-up to run an errand, if you have the time and it makes you feel good, do it (to each her own).  Personally, I do not need make-up or certain clothes to feel beautiful.  I am confident in my own skin. Clothes certainly do not give me self-respect or give me the ability to show respect. 
I have seen women and men dressed to the nines that have been disrespectful to others and I have seen homeless people in rags show respect and love.  I am who I am no matter the clothes I don. 
I know a woman who has been at the hospital for days taking care of her child going through chemo who I admire deeply.  This woman is wearing a sweater and yoga pants and after she has spent a day at the hospital with her son in comfortable clothes, she runs to the grocery to get dinner for her family at home and runs by the Mall to pick up a new pair of navy pants for her other son to wear school.  He had grown out of his other pants.  This woman has an amazing work ethic, self-respect, dignity, worth and a compassionate heart.  I admire her.
I know a woman who has been volunteering her time and working outside to help build a home for a family in need.  This woman is wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt (and yes, they are even soiled after her hard days work).  After her full days work to help a family in need, she runs to the grocery.  I admire this strong, giving woman. 
I know a woman who cleans homes for a living.  She is in sweatpants and a sweatshirt.  After she works her tail off, she races to pick up her kids from school and shuttles them to sports practices and runs by the grocery.  I admire this hard working woman.
Some wear business suits Monday-Friday and welcome the opportunity to dress casual.  In fact, my husband is one of those men who travels the world and routinely interfaces with corporate leadership.  On the weekends, he welcomes the chance to turn his hat around backwards, wear comfy clothes and drive his truck. 
We are grounded, down-to-earth, strong individuals who do not feel the need to impress the people at the grocery store. 
We try and raise our children the best we can.  We believe each of them is unique and has their own special gifts.  Our hope is that our children realize their power from within, discover their gifts and share them with others, affecting society in a positive way.  Hard Work is paramount to success.  Balance. Work, Rest, Play.  Give your best; but you do not need to strive for perfection.  Don’t take yourself too seriously.  Our house is not perfect.  We work hard. We laugh. If we fall, we get back up. Get your hands dirty. 
Just as we try and teach our children balance in life and making good decisions, so it is with attire…to know the right times to wear the right things.
I can get dressed up with the best and hold my own; but, I can also get down and dirty in the trenches.
Life is a balancing act. 
Next time you see a woman at the grocery store in yoga pants, you may just want to think twice about who she is…You never know, you may have just come across Wonder Woman.


Journey to Oz: Finishing Heartland 100

What a road we just traveled on October 12th starting at 6am in Cassoday, Kansas.  Our yellow brick road to Oz was a little different than the one in the movie.  It was extremely rocky, rather hilly, hot and generally no shade; but, the finish line was far greater than I ever dreamed.
100 miles is the hardest physical and mental challenge I have ever accomplished.  Going into a race of 100 miles, I tried to do as much mental preparation and physical training as my schedule would allow.  I trained for over a year.  I had a coach and a training plan to ensure I was on track with mileage, nutrition, etc.  I also did yoga, meditated, prayed and read positive books to ensure I was filling my brain with the right nutrition.  And throughout the year long preparation, I had a purpose.  I was raising money for the Family Scholar House, a 501C3 organization that changes the cycle of poverty through education. 
But, 100 miles tests you like no other.  No matter how much preparation you do, you will be tested.
It was an amazing journey filled with smiles, sunrises, sunsets, laughs, tears (just a few), determination, teamwork and persistence.  I learned so much about myself, life and the power of the human spirit. 
I had a heart, courage and brain going into the race but I was tested.  Along my 30 hour journey to Oz, thankfully the entire infamous cast of characters of “The Wizard of Oz” presented themselves at just the right moments to help me through to the finish line.
The Tin Man, a fellow racer and friend, paid me a visit the night before the race, reminding me about the importance of pacing yourself, especially in the beginning, to ensure you had enough energy to endure the miles and struggles.  He kept me on pace for the first 40 miles of the race.  I was already aware of the “pacing yourself” concept; but, I think it took God sending a person to me to make sure I stuck to this because I am notorious for going out of the gate to fast.   
All of my crew members at some time or another over the 30 hours were my Lion, Scarecrow, Tin Man and Good Witch.  My crew was the TinMan (brain) for me at many times, reminding me to eat and drink in the wee hours of the night when delirium had set in, making sure I had the right clothes on and keeping me on pace.
And oh my, did I have a crew of Scarecrows with hearts.  They had heart and brought out the best heart in me.  They wanted me to finish so bad I could feel it.  I was witnessing them giving everything of themselves to help me finish.  The love I felt from them was immeasurable.  To witness one crew member, Ann, keep going when she was hurt herself was beyond having a heart.  She was the one taking the majority of the miles with me and really taking it for the team.  She gave everything she had out on that course; determination, heart, food, music, laughs, light, even the shirt off her back.  In them giving me their hearts, I discovered more of my own.
And my momma was certainly my heart.  She came in and paced me for 8 miles in the middle of the night. We prayed the rosary during our time together.  It was really special to share that time with her.  Although my Mom pulls courage out in me, in that moment, she represented the scarecrow (love) so much to me, that I said I really needed the other crew members to pace me in the rest of the way because when I saw my momma I just wanted to cuddle up in her arms and let her hold me and cry.  Have you ever felt that way?  I am a grown woman but that is how much I was hurting at that point.  So, I knew I had to turn to Ann and my Sister for the remaining miles and let my mom comfort me after the raceJ
The good witches came to find me all along the way…they were of course my crew, the friendly people at the aid stations, my fellow racers, even crews from other racers (Gary and JohnJ).
The wicked witch certainly tried to creep in at times.  Your mind will play tricks on you when you are in such pain and faced with such challenges.  But, I had to stay strong.  My body hurt; but, I had to remind myself that my mind is stronger than my body and I can do this.  I reminded myself why I was there in the first place (The Family Scholar House.  We raised over $11,000 for them but I also wanted to show the people of Family Scholar House that anything is possible with a goal, a plan and lots and lots of hard work.  I also wanted to show my children that anything is possible. I wanted to finish what I started a year ago.) and visualized myself running through the finish line.  Through my positive mental talks and of course, the help from my crew…we silenced that wicked witch and charged on.
Toward the end, we had a car pull up to us who told us he was the “sweeper”.  This meant I was the last person left on the course.  This could have been viewed as a wicked witch and a bit demoralizing; but, we chose to let it motivate us. 
 So, that leads me to the Lion.  Every crew member was a Lion for me, helping me to draw out my courage.  When I broke my toe at mile 91, I was in excruciating pain.  In fact, this is the one time I cried.  And I rarely cry.  I cried because the pain was so excruciating and I also cried because I had come so far. I had already traveled 91 miles. I just had 9 more miles to go. I did not want to stop now. I did not want it to be over.  I wanted to reach my goal.
I had to take my shoe off due to the pain.  I tried to put it back on but my toe hurt too bad to walk on it in the shoe.  I just thought if I could hobble on my heel but my feet were so swollen and blistered from being running/walking on them for 27+ hours at this point that I could not walk on the rocks without a shoe and there was no grass to walk on.   So, we had to think fast.  Well, Ann thought fast.  Ann took off her shirt and used the sweatshirt around her waist and wrapped up my foot.  This protected the bottom of my foot to allow me to be able to hobble along on the rocks.  We kept praying and in about an hour, I was able to put my shoe back on.  Painful, but it was on. 
And then came the ROARING LION at mile 96, my sister.  I have never seen this side of her.  In fact, at times when she was yelling at me, I almost laughed inside of myself as she was yelling at me because it was so not her.  She was not going to let this goal slip away from me.  She was yelling at me and saying everything under the sun to get me to run and run faster.  Well it worked.  She somehow got me to shave 16 minutes off of my current pace (for 4 miles) and got me to the finish line at 12:04pm on Sunday October 13th.  Yes, 30 hours of work on that yellow brick rocky road.    The “sweeper” was even behind us for the last 3 miles watching us.  We learned after the race that he was calling in to the race director saying, “You won’t believe this! They are running! They are running!”  He watched us in amazement as my sister helped me to get up to a decent pace and make it in to the finish line.  Yes, last person to FINISH the Heartland 100.  The proudest I have ever been of last place in my life.  I could have bailed out at so many points during the race.  In fact, there were many other people who started the race that did not finish.  But, not me.  Last place or not, I finished. I was not racing against anyone else.  A race of that magnitude, I was my only competition.   My heart actually hurt for my fellow racers who did not make it to the last aid station at the cut-off time and were pulled from the course. I finished one of the biggest accomplishments of my life and certainly the hardest mental and physical task I have ever completed.
It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from Nelson Mandela, “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”
Without facing challenges and facing fears, we are not growing.  To Live, to TRULY LIVE… is to GROW.  Through such a journey to Oz, traveling from light to darkness to light again, I learned about myself and about the good of humanity. I walked away from the race, knowing we need people in life.  And it’s okay to need people. 

God put us on this earth to do good and help others.  He gave us each other for a reason.  We are here for one another.  We do not need to go at life alone. 
As the good witch once said, “You have always had the power my dear. You have had it all along.”  We’ve all got the power within us to achieve.  Life is about giving and receiving.  Use your gifts to help others.  Give a smile, knowledge, a helping hand.  And if you need help, seek a mentor and be OPEN to those around you. 
There’s no place like home.  Home in my books is where you are in the moment.  You are where you are supposed to be and that includes the goods and the bads; the storms and all of the “somewhere over the rainbows” moments.  Thankfully, there are lots and lots of people to be on this magical journey with us.
 Thanks to all of you who helped me reach this amazing goal.  Yes, I had the power all along; but, thank you to each of you who helped bring out the best in me to get to the finish line and help me through life.

xxoo